Friday, June 29, 2007

yes, it is nice

Snippet from this morning’s conversation with an employee of a case management company that contracts with blue cross to provide extra nurse management services & information to their patients with seizure disorder and other diagnoses [insert thick…maybe Alabama…accent for “B”]:

B: “Now, is he in a group home? Or something like that? Or to what does he owe the privilege of having two moms?”

A: “Well, we’re lesbians. One of us birthed him.”

[slight pause]

B: “Oh. That’s nice.”

1 comment:

eeka said...

Ugh.

I'm in the very early stages of doing some research about that kind of subtlely ignorant comment and their affects. I have a theory that these comments actually do more in the way of oppression than outwardly hostile comments, because there isn't really much to put our fingers on and speak out about. Even when someone's comments are enough over the line to comment on (but still not grossly inappropriate), you don't get anywhere. I do actually lodge complaints at hospitals when people ask me what my "husband" does for a living, and I give them the context that the staff could use more training on not making assumptions. I usually get some form letter back saying that their comment didn't harm anyone or compromise patient care. Way more frustrating and hurtful, to me at least, than outright inappropriate behavior where the complaint is resolved and I'm validated for having been wronged. This sort of thing is what's led me to do this research.